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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Tigerlily: [QB] Anthropos, the hard it may sound but you need to stop whining. I can imagine with all the stuff going on right now he's simply not in the mood anymore to listen to you. Again it's a huge change from being a couple in love to be a complete family as a baby changes everything. Most people went through even going through the same situation right now; some adapt easier some have it more harder. I think you need to calm down a little and accept more to have the role of being a mother right now - and it's not gonna change for many years to come. As someone previous advised you have your mother look after the baby sometimes.... grandma is gonna spoil her with bottles and hugs like crazy until you come back and pick her up! You and HIM, your husband, have to find to each other again. You felt unattractive for him during pregnancy, now it's time to get into gear and work on your relationship. Believe me don't nag too much, most guys will just shut down and in the long run it's so hurtful for your marriage. Instead of picking bad things to argue about think and talk about more positive issues. I mean what do you like about your husband? For me it feels like you want out. You mention you wish he would sleep in the spare bedroom! This is definitely a red flag!! Girl, you have to wake up and smell the coffee. You need to decide if you wanna kick him out or be together since in another post you remember how loving he was to you before the baby arrived. Look, during the day if he's not home, get out, get fresh air, link up with other mothers (as previously advised too), have your own schedule and fill your time with activities. It will get you off bad thinking all the time. Now when he's home he needs to be more attentive to you and the baby's needs... that being said it doesn't mean you have to be stucked together every single minute. You know I got four kids and I don't mind if my husband wants to take a nap in the afternoon or wants to lie down early in the evening to look after our brood. My husband is hard working during the week (not even in the same city) and I respect his needs. We do not do everything together when we are at home. Listen, get your mother to babysit your daughter one evening this weekend, pick up some cash, tell your hubby to get dressed, get yourself in style and hit the club, restaurant whatever. Just show him that he means a lot to you, that you don't want to lose him, that you are still attracted to him so much and you wanna make it work. Again, don't be on his @ss so much because that's probably the main reason what blocks his attentiveness towards you. Use positive reinforcement and I don't doubt with a little soft help and a smile he's willing to hold and care for the baby and will find enough time and energy to make you happy too - his wife. Good luck! :) PS: Is he working yet? [/QB][/QUOTE]
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